Hot-Headed Baker Burns Coventry

Millwall have started the season very well. Though I am yet to work out at what stage the nation’s league tables cease to be ‘embryonic’ – what are they now, foetal? – three wins from four for Kenny Jackett’s side leave them sitting in fourth. And nine points from 12 is decent form in anyone’s book.

Ireland’s Industry; That Is What We Are

If you’re lucky enough to follow Magic Spongers on Twitter (advantageous as the inexplicable ravings are restricted to 140-characters), you’ll know that I watched the second half of Aston Villa’s tie with Rapid Vienna with interest. For some reason, you got the impression an implosion was coming, and it duly arrived, making Kevin MacDonald’s side the dodgiest villa I’ve seen in Europe since my post A-levels holiday to Tenerife.

Some Like It Scot

If you’d asked us at the end of last season about the summer’s activity in the transfer market – and had we been feeling particularly facetious – we’d have probably said something along the lines of: ‘Oh, City will pay £30mn for any English midfielders going, as well as second-tier European footballers, United will be so bereft of funds they’ll get a homeless man in on the cheap and Gordon Strachan will answer everyone’s question about how the SPL would fare in England by signing 12 more players from Rangers and Celtic’.

Good Times At Goodison?

Mikel Arteta – Spanish or English? Well let’s be honest, he’s about as English as Manuel Almunia; who is as English as Antonio Banderas playing a Spanish waiter in a Spanish re-make of Fawlty Towers.

England captain Steven Gerrard said recently of the Everton midfielder, “I'd certainly love nothing better than to see Mikel Arteta available for England. You want to play with the best players, and if it makes the England squad better, of course I'd like to see it”. As an Englishman, extremely disappointed in my national team, I would find it hard to argue against his inclusion in the next squad; something we have already fore-fronted on the blog. And you have only to ask any Everton fan what the guile of their number 8 means to them. Now fully fit, he could make the difference to Everton’s season.

Keeping Wolves from the (Trap)door

PARTISAN ALERT – While most of us spend our time trying to keep them out, Drew Kearns explains why this year, the Wolves themselves have battened down the hatches and barricaded themselves inside Molineux with 1,057 sandbags, copies of every Premier League table since 1992, some loo roll and a healthy dose of belief.

It lurks in dressing rooms up and down the country, hiding in lockers, behind mirrors, inside showers, beneath piles of dirty kit. Always ready to strike and claim a new victim. Ready for its name to be cited as the reason for heartbreak, heartache and fortunes lost. Its malevolent presence is a source of constant fear for those who otherwise appear so sage and safe. This year I am concerning myself with this painful disease; this infection of our beautiful game. It is of course second-season syndrome, and I am a Wolverhampton Wanderers supporter.

The Bigger Pitchure

This plastic pitch stuff is a right old bru-ha-ha, isn’t it? ‘It’s not an excuse’, harrumphed Harry Redknapp, before going on the claim that at least four of his elite, highly-paid, professional sportsmen ‘couldn’t handle’ playing on what was essentially a soft flat carpet. I’ve heard all about the ramifications of artificial pitches for the knees of Ledley King and Tom Huddlestone, but then I’ve also been hearing about how hard and unforgiving ‘these new grass pitches’ are for the last five years. Surely spraying gallons of water over any pitch before kick-off makes them reasonably dangerous too?

Boothroyd Enjoys Platt-itudes On Watford Return

This season, our aim is to actually get round some of the London grounds (we do live here, after all), given that last season, with the same intention, we made it to a total of maybe three. After Stevenage last week, this week it's the return of Aidy Boothroyd to Vicarage Road.

'I don't think it'll be that bad,' said the Watford fan in the pub of their reaction to Aidy Boothroyd, as the former Hornets manager returned to Vicarage Road with Coventry City. 'There might be some tutting', he added thoughtfully. 'That or some folks opening their thermos more aggressively than normal'.